In which I am a crotchety old lady

A few bits of news:

1. The site header has finally been redone!

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The new header features: (a) a more up-to-date photo of The Author (as well as The Author’s Hair), (b) pictures that are actually lined up properly, and (c) some of The Author’s bad art (and one piece of good art by someone who is not The Author). Hooray!

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For those unfamiliar with the subjects of the drawings seen here, they’re all characters from Chosen. Left-to-right, we see Mr. Defrin, Kaine, Nicholas, Darek, and (suspiciously well-drawn) Hema.

2. Speaking of Chosen, for anyone who didn’t get the chance to read the sneak peak of the first few chapters, you can still do so here:

https://tjbaer.com/2015/06/12/a-sneak-peak-at-chosen-book-i/

For the uninitiated, Chosen is the first volume of my upcoming LGBT fantasy series, which I mention on this blog approximately every .25 seconds. I’ve actually made some changes to the first few chapters over the last few days, as well as adding in some new material to the “sneak peak” post above, so even if you’ve already had a look at it, now might be a good time to go have one more. Ya know. If you want to.

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3. For those who are unaware, the Chicago Blackhawks recently won the Stanley Cup, which is apparently kind of a big deal. To celebrate, they had a parade, a huge stadium event, and a general all-day avalanche of merrymaking downtown today.

As one of the few people in Chicago who doesn’t give any damns at all about professional sports, I found myself surrounded for much of the day by happy, chattering masses of people in Blackhawks jerseys, who got progressively happier, louder, and drunker as the day went on.

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Artist’s rendering. Strange how so many Blackhawks fans seem to be tiny and bald.

I’m thrilled that so many people were so very happy today, but as I’m a crotchety old lady who dislikes crowds, noise, youngins, and  especially crowds of noisy youngins, today was something of an exercise in self-control. And, I’m pleased to say, I managed to get through the entire day without once waving my cane over my head and shouting for everyone to keep it down / keep off my lawn, so I consider it a victory.

Incidentally, I seem to have a unique combination of traits that make me the absolute antithesis of other Chicagoans: I don’t care about sports, I prefer thin-crust pizza, and I always, always put ketchup on hot dogs (an offense punishable by death within the Chicago city limits).

What can I say? I’m just a rebel. A crotchety old lady rebel.

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Seen above: Me.


 

Edit: Apparently, this marks my 100th post on this blog! Wow and hooray and woot!

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I suggest we celebrate by having everyone immediately go and mail me one hundred $1 bills. Or, because I am exceptionally kindhearted, I will also accept $100 in any denomination of your choice. <3

In which I break up with Japan

Shortly after writing my recent post about the couture-related challenges of being gender fluid, The Author vs. Clothing, I was inspired to go to the thrift store and pick up some dirt-cheap articles of clothing to suit my less feminine days, which turned out to be a very good decision.

And I also did one more thing.

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I finally cut my hair.

Just to be clear, I didn’t get my hair cut – I cut it my damn self, armed with nothing but dull scissors, my bathroom mirror, and the knowledge that I can’t even cut paper in a straight line. And yeah, it was as much of a disaster as you’re probably imagining.

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But really, it’s Pride Month, so who wants a perfectly straight haircut anyway? Continue reading

Thoughts on Star Trek: The Original Series

So, as I mentioned before, I’ve recently been working my way through Star Trek: The Original Series, which despite my all-around nerdiness and love of sci-fi, I’d somehow never seen before.

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I know. Madness.

I’ve been very much enjoying the series (when not raging about its hilariously awful treatment of women), and have been compiling my thoughts and reactions while working my way from episode to episode. I offer them to you now, because otherwise, I have no idea what to post about.

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Let’s boldly go…to my random comments on a classic science fiction series full of bad props, hilarious overacting, and rampant sexism. ENGAGE!

Continue reading

I feel pretty and witty and…

Because “gay” really should go back to meaning “happy,” some smile-inducing LGBTQ tidbits from around the web:

1. Gandalf and Dumbledore got married across the street from the Westboro Baptist Church, and it was – wait for it – magical.

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http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2015/06/10/that-magical-moment-dumbledore-and-gandalf-got-married-across-from-westboro-baptist-church/

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Mazel tov, gentlemen. <3 Continue reading

The Author vs. Clothing

Just in case you missed it, you are now, for the first time ever, able to read the first few chapters of my upcoming LGBT fantasy book, Chosen, a novel Jon Stewart will someday hail as, “The best book I ever would’ve discussed in front of a live studio audience if I were still doing book-related interviews on The Daily Show, but as I’m leaving the show in August, I guess I’ll never get the chance to shower T.J. Baer with well-deserved kudos and flaily fanboying. Sigh.”

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Sorry, Jon. You had your chance.

Read the first three chapters here.

In other news, my struggles against technology, entropy, and gravity continue, but today I’d like to talk about a different sort of struggle:

Fricking clothing.

adventuretime_lemonguy_clothes Continue reading

Which involves eyeliner and a Bieber wig

As I mentioned in my last post, this blog is currently hovering just short of 100 followers. And because (a) it’s Pride Month, and (b) I’ve been going through the pictures on my phone and discovering a wealth of interesting and/or incriminating photos from The Past, I’ve decided to provide you with a once in a lifetime offer of amazingness.

Should this blog pass 100 followers, I will post something here that has never before seen the light of day, something that brings me a perplexing mix of amusement, embarrassment, and pride.

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Friends, if we pass 100 followers, I will post…

Continue reading