In which gay teens fight monsters

I’d hoped to get some writing done today, and shockingly, I did! :O

…but not on the project I was actually hoping to work on. Ah, well. :P I’d been hoping to add to my forever-WIP and gay fantasy epic (TM), Chosen, but instead I unearthed a long-ago begun story and added a few chapters to it.

Said story is tentatively entitled Guardians, and it’s a fun little YA story about teens fighting monsters and trying to stop the end of the world, because that plot hasn’t been done before.

The story, though, is surprisingly engaging, and I can say that because I started writing it long enough ago that it no longer feels like something I wrote. :P The main character, Alisha, is a kickass seventeen-year-old with frizzy hair and a talent for fighting monsters and keeping her narcissistic younger brother out of trouble. Her mother fought monsters back when she was a teenager but now is Retired, and her dad is a researcher who likes punning, Doctor Who, and annoying his children in the most loving way possible.

I have, of course, felt obliged to put as much gay into the story as possible, so Alisha’s older sister has a girlfriend, her brother’s love interest is an awesome trans girl, and Alisha has definite chemistry with nemesis and fellow teen monster-hunter, Belladonna.

Anyway, here’s a quick excerpt from a draft of a scene when Alisha visits Belladonna’s excessively nice house in search of info about this whole ‘end of the world’ thing:

Continue reading

How could I sneak with this fine physique?

Greetings, friends. Greetings and hello and hello and also greetings.

I find myself with a bit of time to spare this evening, so I thought it was about time I posted an update. So to all those readers who have been weeping bitter tears into their pillows at night wondering when I would return, you may now rest easy. Your prayers have been answered.

So! An update:

Life as of late has mostly involved me in my apartment alternately teaching occasional lessons to private students online and watching old TV shows that remind me of my lost youth~*~*. Today was a marathon of Garfield and Friends, and prior to that, I revisited The Bob Newhart ShowPerfect Strangers, The Mary Tyler Moore Show, Frasier, and a number of others, and I would’ve rewatched The Golden Girls as well, except that I’ve watched the series through so many times that I still have the majority of the jokes memorized. And I am 100% that person who can’t resist saying all the funniest lines along with the characters, so I don’t recommend ever watching Golden Girls with me if you want to enjoy the experience.

I also watched the final season of She-Ra and the Princesses of Power on Netflix, and it was amazing and glorious and so very, unapologetically gay. Highly recommended. I don’t wish to spoil anyone, so I will simply include this magnificent photo of Scorpia and move on without further comment:

In writing-related news, there was a three- or four-day span a few weeks ago when I wrote from morning ’til night every day and cranked out around 25,000 words of Chosen. 

I finally had to take a break from this manic pace because I was losing sleep and forgetting to eat, but it was fun while it lasted. :P I’m hoping to get back into writing mode again soon, though hopefully I can manage to get some writing done while simultaneously also remembering to eat, sleep, shower, etc. #writerlife, amirite?

Not much else has been going on, alas. The highlights of my life at present include: (a) finding new ESL textbooks that I can download for free on the internet, (b) episodes of Garfield that involve The Ant Song , (c) discovering that Project Gutenberg has an ebook I want and thus I don’t have to pay $100,000 for it on the Amazon Kindle store, and (d) cinnamon toast. Cinnamon toast is great. <3

It’s a wild life I lead.

If anyone isn’t already following me on Twitter and would like to add to my legions of devoted fans (Twitter persists in saying that I have only 30 followers, but I’m sure that’s just a typo), you may find me here: @tjbaerwrites.

A scenario entirely unconnected to current events

Firefighters: So, we’ve been making some progress on putting out the fire, but as you can see, there’s still a lot of work left to do.

People: Oh, yeah, it looks so much better! Okay, you can stop now.

Firefighters: But…there’s…still fire?

People: Nah, I think we’re heading in the right direction. Just stop what you’re doing and we’re sure it’ll be fine. We’re going to go back inside now, k?

Firefighters: The building is on FIRE.

People: Yeah, but we’re tired of standing out here safely away from something that could kill us, so we think we’d rather just go back inside and get our lives back to normal.

Firefighters: THE BUILDING IS ON FIRE. You can’t go back to your normal lives when the whole place is burning down around you. And if it keeps burning, other buildings might catch on fire, too, and burn down the whole city.

People: This is America, dammit, and that means we have the right to a life of freedom in a burning building if that is what we choose! USA! USA! USA!

Firefighters: ….

Teacher/Editor/Writer/Anything-Really for Hire

Greetings, friends!  It’s been awhile, eh? So, anything new or absolutely horrifying happen since I’ve been gone?

Yeahhhh. It’s been…a time lately, hasn’t it?  Fortunately, ESL teaching is one of those jobs that can  be done online, so I’ve been teaching my regular classes from the comfort of my cat-filled home for the past month or so. Not so fortunately, my company is laying off the majority of its teaching staff starting Tuesday, and I am part of that majority.

In an effort to keep myself afloat for the next few months, I’m once again offering private English lessons online, and I’m also available for writing and editing services as well, should anyone be interested in such a thing.

If anyone out there knows of someone who might be interested in studying English with a TEFL-certified instructor with 12+ years of experience, kindly direct them to my recently spiffed-up site:

The site is in English and Japanese, so if you or your interested-in-studying-English friend is a Japanese speaker, hurrah! :D I’ll take students of any nationality, though, of course. :P

Anyway. I hope all of you are passing this bizarre time safely and comfortably. Any assistance in finding those willing to hire me in any capacity is greatly appreciated! <3

SO YOU WANT TO BE A VEGAN… (Part 2: Calcium)

Hello, friends. You may remember me from such posts as SO YOU WANT TO BE A VEGAN… (Part 1) and Nutritiony Things I Have Learned # 1 (Protein). Or perhaps this is your first visit to my weird little blog, in which I case, welcome.

In today’s installment of SO YOU WANT TO BE A VEGAN, we’ll be looking at some common myths about veganism, because there are about 735,000 of them, and we should probably make a start on that. Today’s myth concerns calcium, and why these wacky vegans refuse to get it from cow’s milk like everybody else.

So whether you’re vegan, vegetarian, or frowning at your screen with a piece of bacon hanging out of your mouth, venture below for more information on those wild plant-loving scamps, The Vegans. *cue ’80s-sitcom-style theme song* Continue reading

In which I am still weird, queer, and vegan, but now in Virginia

TJ, where have you been? Our lives are empty and meaningless without you! WHY, WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN US?

I hear your cries, dear readers, and for that reason I have returned. You may rest easy now that your source of incoherent rambles about veganism, writing, and queer culture is back, and you no longer need cry into your pillow at 3 AM, staring up at the moon and wondering if I, too, am staring up at that very same moon.

As you can see, the time away has not done much to improve my general state of weirdness. Continue reading